I've been thinking a lot about the topic recently. Coming home, I've noticed that my parents aren't perfect. They have their sarcasm, their eye rolls, their disagreements. But all in all, they still have a lot of love for each other. And even more than that, they have a strong commitment to each other. It brings to mind the Nickel Creek song, "Why should the fire die? My mom and dad kept theirs alive."
Love can't carry a person through marriage. Commitment is more important. Meaning you're always looking out for one another, always helping each other, always working together to become better people.
It can be easy to forget that marriage is meant to be a constructive institution. Neither person wants to hurt the other. But it can be hard to remember that after living together for so long when patience wears thin.
They say marriage is hard, but that's why we don't do it alone. God promises to help us and the only way a marriage can work is with the help of the Lord. And I don't just want my marriage to work. I want it to rock. I want to work so hard for my husband that my love and commitment to him will overwhelm me. I want to keep in my mind and heart the reasons why I married him. I want to be his soulmate, the kind that is formed after you're sealed to each other by the power of God and you become each other's soulmate. I want to want to be with him even after decades of being together. I want to still feel lucky and blessed that he chose me when we're thirty-seven and stuck in a repetitive routine.
I want to be part of something that's so rich with work, understanding, care, spirituality, and joy that I cannot help but smile when I come home.
I feel like some people would tell me that that's a fantasy. But I have a deeply rooted feeling that it's possible. And I pray very hard that every married and future-married person will see that too.
Goodness knows I'll have a lot more to say on the subject when I join the lot myself, but for now, I'm grateful for strong examples, a loving Heavenly Father, and the preparations one kid's making now to commit to me someday. (:
Love to all. Happy Holidays.