Sometimes life is fantastic, and sometimes life just sucks. I think this all links back to agency. When we choose good things and make our own way back to our Heavenly Father, we are filled with so much more joy than if we were to be forced onto the path. Similarly, when we get impatient and want to push other things into our molds, we are met with agency that might not be on the same page as ours, and that is incredibly frustrating.
Neal A. Maxwell says, "Patience is not only a companion of faith but is also a friend to free agency. Inside our impatience there is sometimes an ugly reality: We are plainly irritated and inconvenienced by the need to make allowance for the free agency of others. In our impatience--which is not the same thing as divine discontent--we would override others, even though it is obvious that our individual differences and preferences are so irretrievably enmeshed with each other that the only resolution which preserves free agency is our patience and longsuffering with each other. "
Overall, I feel rather crappy today. I've made the choice to take some steps that I feel good about, but it doesn't feel good to take those steps. In addition, I've got some other life goals of mine that are being postponed. I think the Lord is teaching me a big huge lesson on patience right now.
Patience is not apathy. Actually, it is caring very much, but deferring your will to a Being infinitely more knowledgeable than you. That's what Maxwell says, anyway.
I'm not good at being patient. I don't know anyone who is. I've always been someone who knows what I want and then I go out and get it. This will take a little more time. I guess the important things always do. In the meantime, though, I don't want these circumstances to discourage me. I will keep on with my eye single to the most important things in this life and will remember that I am moving forward, no matter how much my circumstances might seem to be sliding back.
At any rate, I thought I'd share a little blurb for you all on patience. Learn to desire what God would desire for you and you will fall into the rhythm of life that feels most sweet and comfortable because it's right.
Anywho, just dinkin around on Garageband yesterday and came up with a little ditty.See Me
Love you all,